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We’re here today to be led by the bro-mance
For this trail we’re wearing kilts instead of pants
There’ll be checks for your new “attire”
Please no shIggy that causes crotch “fire”
We’ll solve trail with a cool breeze be-lows
ShipWreckum and Fuckleup are our kilt pimps not ho’s
Repeat after me:
Bless these hares
Bless this trail
Shiggy us no hurt our bottom us
Beer van us no break us
And cop us no stop us
In the name of the flour
And the fun
And the Holy run
FuckleUp & ShipWrecktum were the hares. HotQuarterLoad was the FRB and IBSmart &
OnAhead won the Brainless Award.
Holy Kilts Batman; what
a great turn out of skirts for a fun JRH3 Bromance trail! FuckleUp and
ShipWrecktum did a fine job of live haring their Bromance trail without getting
snared. We enjoyed adult kilt checks and baby diaper kilt checks; Highland and
Lowland splits, and a sighting of the worst case of unattended dicky-dido I’ve
ever seen; thank you AlwaysTheBull for THAT…and you can keep my little light, by
the way. We were entertained by first-timer brawn; thank you WillSingForHead for
bringing JustCorey; JRH3 harrietts look forward to seeing more of him at future
hashes. Congratulations go to DickFibrillater who finally obtained his 69th
headband; I wonder how many road miles that headband is worth! Mr. Show-off,
a.k.a. HotQuarterLoad, poured-on the energy at the final stretch of trail to run
ahead of Where’sMyGoat and I to win a date with FuckleUp’s Mom again. I tried
hard to take the lead from him as I’ve heard good things about Fuckle’s mom from
Ship; unfortunately obtaining FBI status doesn’t even get me a photo of her to
put on my bathroom wall; but I digress. Because the pack ended up daisy-chaining
while waiting for I-BeSmart and On-Ahead to join the circle, the two wankers won
the brainless award for taking so long to finish trail without having
sex-on-trail. Big thanks to GayRodeoClown for taking her panties off for
Swing-Low; however I must ask what she was doing wearing underwear beneath her
Thank you LikesToWatch for once again servicing our need to quench our thirst on trail, and thank you WannaEarnAnA for servicing our need to quench our thirst at circle--you Harrietts rock! Kudos to AccidentalAnal for his humorous virgin hare blessing as well as his virgin hash flashing (woohoo!); we look forward to more of that this Saturday! Most of all, thanks to all wanks who participated in Wednesday’s Jolly Roger H3 #579 trail; it’s always a pleasure to be at the helm of a such a fun and humorous group of hashers!
Trail Directions & Info
of the Tampa Bay Metro Area
Tilted Kilt Hash
Wednesday, July 11th, 2010
Where: Meet at the Tilted Kilt Pub & Eatery, located at 14457 N Dale Mabry, in Tampa, FL.
When: Meet at 6:30 PM, on trail at 7:30 PM sharp!
Directions:Click here for a map.
From Wesley Chapel, to the North: Go south on I-75, south on I-275, right, or west on Bearrs, at Exit 53, for 3.1 miles, left, or south on N Dale Mabry for .4 miles and find the Tilted Kilt on the left.
From I-275 & I-4, in Central Tampa, to the South: Go north on I-275 for 7.1 miles, left, or west on Fletcher, at Exit 52, for 3.2 miles, right , or north on N Dale Mabry for .9 mile and find the Tilted Kilt on the right.
From Lakeland, to the East: Go west on I-4, north on I-275 for 4.8 miles, left, or west Fletcher, at Exit 52, for 3.2 miles, right , or north on N Dale Mabry for .9 mile and find the Tilted Kilt on the right.
From Clearwater, to the West: Go east FL-60 across Tampa Bay, north on the Veteran's Expressway for 3.5 miles, right, or east on Waters for 2.4 miles, left on Dale Mabry for 3.7 miles and find O'Brien's on the right.
Donations: Suggest $6 for drinkers and $3 for non-drinkers.
Theme: Wear a kilt (not a skirt) on trail. Then, at the on after, the guys can ask waitresses to prove the name isn't false advertising and the ladies can show them how to really wear a kilt!
Remarks: If you don't have a kilt be inventive. Get yourself a skirt at the Goodwill Store, or try wrapping a curtain or even a towel around you if nothing else. Or just get one for next time.
On After: The on after will be at the Tilted Kilt, back at the start where they will have "reverse happy hour". From 10:00 PM to 12:00 PM they will have half price domestic draft & well drinks and $5 cheese pizza.
Hares:ShipWrecktum & FuckleUp will be the hares. More info to follow.
Phone Number: For more information, or in case you get lost, call our mobile phone at 813-943-4855.