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Click
here to view the pics.
Its time for the three of
us to come to the hash
Tampa and Jolly Roger riding Lexington's Horse's Ass
We welcome our visitors
I'm sure they're inquisitors
And wondering where they will crash
They once did a hash in Kentucket
When they got there, they just said 'f*ck it'!
So they got on the road
And drove a 'shit load'
In Tampa, they started a riot!
Leading this trail is Bangs Her Mash
Who's haring his second Jolly Roger Hash
Good thing there's joint credits
This rhyme might need edits
Hash Trash
There were so many
things to celebrate Wednesday night at the JRH3/TBH3 joint hash; I just
don’t know where to start! Plenty of hashing visitors and virgins joined us
from Kentucky to sky rocket the attendance to 69 wankers plus 6. The Tampa
Bay H3 GM, Shetland Bony and the Jolly Roger H3 RA, Harelip Dogg tag-teamed
to keep the pack focused. They were easy to pick out of the crowd since they
were wearing the same exact hash clothes; they had called each other to
coordinate this fashion faux pas. We celebrated Shot by a Whore’s first full
year of recuperation from being shot in the back; so we nailed him from all
directions with our water guns. Gatorate My Penis was a good wanking sport
and donned the 169 pound FRB chain to wear while running the trail; and we
all assumed Harelip would get it back by the end of the night. Bangs and
Gutless were off, chalk talk was well executed, and the pack drained beer
cups and took off with flashlights into the dark.
Trail started out on the road, and diverted quickly into shiggy (level 3).
Portopussy streaked by me and I asked him if he planned to win the hash to
make up for arriving late. He slowed down and sand-bagged trail, knowing the
chain weighed more than he did. Runners approached a cement barrier and
being the GI Jane I think I am, I climbed over it quickly (in my own mind).
There was a suggestion from behind (you know who you are OxyRambo) offering
help over the barrier…dang it if I went over the barrier too fast! There
were plenty of ladies’ checks along trail; and harriers please take note;
there are only so many times I’ll fall for the need for reenactment! The
trail took a harsh shiggy turn on powder in the dark, and wankers twisted
ankles and made up new cuss words on the railroad tracks. The un-sprung
metal bear traps and loosely spread razor wire on the tracks worked at
slowing us down and gave us awesome opportunities for blood on trail. Just
Karen got 10 points as she kept up with the front runners and avoided all
metal shrapnel and shiggy on the tracks without a flashlight. The rest of us
runners with flashlights fell over large metal shards and spike ball-laden
shiggy. I noticed Gatorate had slowed down just a tad on the tracks which
gave Just Joe a terrific opportunity to deliver an ear-deafening crack to
Gatorate’s butt cheek. While I was impressed and glad it wasn’t me; I
suggested Just Joe pick up his speed because what goes around comes around.
We had a hash halt for beer, which turned into a “run for the hills” beer
check as Tampa’s finest were called-in. The runners ran to the trees while
Shetland closed down shop and got the hell out of Dodge with the keg; he
knew better than to hand over Dab and GRC's van to the city! Unfortunately
that left the Turkeys without their favorite beverage; but on a lighter
note, it made it that much sweeter for them to get to Finish! We busted
through trees to hit railroad tracks again, and Just Joe’s hand had
continued to sting and swell. Rumor has it that One Night Stand pulled a
groin muscle while he snared the hares (just how was he snaring them?) and
Begs came in as FRB. Holy nut sack, the FRB tables had turned! As we pulled
close to Finish, a few of us were stopped along side of the road by a pair
of pretty red and blue flashing lights. I found it a bit humorous that I was
explaining we were just a running club while wearing my “boob check” shirt.
That was when one of the officers mentioned he hashed when he was in the
Marine Corps. We were given an escort into Finish, and Circle was relocated
to the parking lot at the on-after.
Dufuss donned a very silly hat to advertise a run in Gainesville this
weekend, while Gatorate My Penis was tied off for his 10th hash. Many
virgins entertained the pack, and one harrier in particular rivaled
Harelip’s zest for exposure. Yippee for us harriettes! Two blow jobs were
given and Lunesta was held upright for a proper send-off. While sexual
favors were bartered for a few cool KY t-shirts and the birthday boy in the
kitchen got a birthday surprise; Shot by a Whore showed off his new
t-shirt…and it is quite fitting!
“ Smoking doesn’t kill people, crack heads with guns kill people.
–Shot by a Whore”
It just doesn’t get any better than that!
On-On!
Casual Friday
"Joint" Jolly Roger
H3/Tampa Bay H3
Special Wendesday"Jelly" Hash
Wednesday, September 3rd, 2008 Hash
What:
Where:
When: Meet at 6:30 PM, on trail at 7:30 PM sharp!
Directions:
Click
here for a map. From
I-275 and Dale Mabry, in Central Tampa:
Go north on Dale Mabry
for 3.6 miles, left, or west Pinecrest, which becomes Sligh, for 2.1
miles and find the starting location on the left at Johns Rd.
From Wesley Chapel, to the north: Go south on I-75, south on I-275, right, or west on Hillsborough for 4.9 miles, at Exit 47, right on Hoover for 1.1 miles, left on Sligh for .4 miles and find the starting location on the left at Johns Rd.
From St. Pete, to the south: Go north on I-275, left, or north on the Veterans Express way, at Exit 39B, for 3.7 miles, right on Hillsborough, at Exit 4, for .4 miles, left on Hoover for 1.1 miles, left on Sligh for .4 miles and find the starting location on the left at Johns Rd.
From Brandon, to the East: Go north on I-75, east on I-4, north on I-275, left, or west on Hillsborough for 4.9 miles, at Exit 47, right on Hoover for 1.1 miles, left on Sligh for .4 miles and find the starting location on the left at Johns Rd.
From Clearwater, to the west: Go east on Hwy 60, north on the Veterans' Expressway for 1.4 miles, right on Hillsborough, at Exit 4, for .4 miles, left Hoover for 1.1 miles, left on Sligh for .4 miles and find the starting location on the left at Johns Rd.
Cost:
Special Instruction:
Trail:
Hare:
On After:
Phone Number:
