Jolly Roger H3
of the Tampa Bay Metro Area
Run #405
Thursday, August 30th 2008



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Hare Blessing

It’s the Heat of the Summer,
and what could be ‘funner’
than running around in the heat!

But this trail is sloppy
And all kinds of sloshy
But I think that that’s kinda neat!
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You’ll surely get wet
So you’d better get set
And arm yourselves to the gills

A soaking that’s super
I’ll be in a stupor
Until I get a water gun that needs no refills
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So, Dab and GRC
Get out, and take the lead
And get ready for your watery attack

Through water and shiggy
Will we need a dingy?
I’ll be happy with a tasty six-pack!

Hash Trash

Gathered in Wesley Chapel were big guns, little guns, drippy pistols and wanks without guns hoping to launch water balloons. After a watery blessing of the hares, the pack was off in all their plastic weapons. I felt well-armed with Wanna Earn An A’s 500 pound “Orca” water gun with multiple firing holes (sweet!) but was outdone by Sloppy’s AIM-9 Sidewinder and W.A.D.’s grenade launcher. Like a dumbass, I asked what a grenade launcher was and lost my left ovary; lesson learned (what not to ask). Other wankers learned not to complain about anything, or they received a steady stream of water until complaining ceased. Allow me to add t hat the beer van is not “goal” and wankers learned to pour beer and move on quickly while under rapid fire. Another lesson learned; all wankers are sitting ducks if they were standing still; combat tradition--duh! Wankers should also learn to stop, drop, and roll on trail when shouts of “Friendly Fire!” and “Fire in the Hole!” were heard from the bushes. One last lesson, if the shiggy is still; chances are Oxy-Rambo is hiding behind them in stealth mode with his gun.

The only major issue with carrying big guns (besides carrying one that weighs more than the wanker’s body weight), was the more we used them, the quicker they emptied. A few of us hardcore gunners refilled our large guns in the green nasty streams that the pack trudged-though on trail. Harelip Dogg and Saigon Sally were the balloon launching tag-team in the swamp and the urban tag-team comprised of returners, Whoremoans and Leave It In Beaver. Guess which tag-team got a hot dose of smelly creek water after launching balloons at wankers on trail? Thinking back, I do believe I lost my right ovary and left A-cup to a few under-filled water balloon launchings in the urban section of trail. nbsp; This leads me to think a body part sweep might have been a good idea prior to Circle. The beer van slowed us down as the pack was thirsty and so were our guns. Harelip had a collection of plastic bags hanging from his FRB chain that were filled with stinky creek water. I knew I would have hell to pay when I slipped and fell forward (cough) and grabbed his plastic bags and emptied the stench over his cranium. Likes to Watch figured out why she was getting steady friendly fire on her backside while on trail; seems the red cup tucked upright in the crack of her butt was a fantastic challenge for sharp-shooting gunners to fill while on the move!

Circle was conducted in Dab and GRC’s pool, which made for entertaining blow jobs and proved a challenge for the Religious Advisor to read his notes on soggy paper. Saigon Sally was to be awarded the FRB, but since the chain did not have water wings attached (Sally would have sunk to the bottom wearing the chain) he will wear the chain at the next hash above sea level. Last but not least, 3 1/2 –inch Floppy got his proper send-off as he is off to Washington D.C.!

We had a few good ideas for future namings:

“Not on the head!” --Just Ryan complained about being hit in the back of the head with a stream of water on trail. Every time he said, “Not on the head!” he got shot again…on the head.

“He’s going down!” --A fitting response from Casual Friday while Lightening Rod’s son dove down in the pool to get his blowjob.

My personal side note: wearing a new red sarong in the pool with a white top, is not conducive to keeping a white top white, thanks to poor red dye fastness and chlorine.

Gritty Kitty’s personal note: wearing goggles invites grenade launches in the face and enhances the experience of swimming with nudists.

On-On Wankers!

Casual Friday